Monday, February 22, 2010

Reasons why I suck.

I'm meal planning.

Normally, something I enjoy.  I usually have a list of things I want to create, or old favorites waiting to be added into the rotation. 

Unfortunately, I've been so insanely busy, I've got nothing.  So far I have 8 meals for two weeks.  No matter what kind of math I use, that just doesn't work. 

I'm really struggling to find a happy balance in my life.  Trying to make sure everyone is happy, healthy and satisfied, meals are cooked, house is clean, but I'm also trying to find time for myself.  Tons of sewing projects that I never have time to complete.  A million books waiting on my nightstand to be read, but no time to do it.  Household projects [in the middle of redoing  a lot of things in the house: currently painting the main level in our house].  Trying to work in my daily workouts keeps me awake late into the night. 

I just can't seem to find a happy medium.  I find when I'm "on" with cooking all the time, ironing every Sunday night, chores are done, homework is done, kids working on "save the world projects" instead of playing the wii, everything is as it should be: nothing "me" ever gets done.  On the other hand, if I decide to pull out a project for myself: dinner ends up being pancakes and smoothies, the house is a wreck, and everythings is wrinkled. [Actually that is a lie.  I never skip Sunday night ironing.  I even iron t-shirts.  It's a sickness, really.]

Needless to say: I'm overwhelmed.


How in the world do I do it all?

To top it all off: I applied for 2 part-time jobs.  Clearly I just don't have enough to fill my time.  [Truthfully since my husband lost his 2nd job, things have been sketchy.  Time to try and change that.]

...and the real reason I posted this.  Wondering how much my husband will hate me for putting lentil tacos on the menu this week?  [A great vegetarian, insanely healthy and very cheap recipe.]

The answer:  Probably a lot.

5 comments:

  1. I hear you. And now you know why my house and life is a mess, because I refuse to give up those sewing projects!

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  2. dude. take the messy house and wrinkled t-shirts to fit in some 'you' time. it's SO worth it. no one care if you have some crumbs on the floor or if there are pancakes for dinner. we have pancakes like 3 times a week--most of which for dinner!!

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  3. After I read your post I realized how terribly much I miss you. Love you and your honesty. I wish I could suck in the beautiful way that you do. Make some time for yourself... it's the only way to stay sane.

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  4. Someone once told me that there is enough time in every day to do what God want us to do...and I'm sticking to that! Sometimes I don't complete my list but I hope to do the things that really matter. So even if its pancakes for dinner, enjoying your family and your time together is what is most important.

    I'm sure you are a wonderful mom and wife. Its good to give yourself some grace sometimes :)

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  5. Actually you seem pretty human from this angle, though you express so much more than I could at your age. My generation both admires and is slightly jealous of that.

    It's a bumpy road. The trick is to let go of the handlebars between those hills.

    Keep writing little sister.

    :)

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